Why I Love That Bad Guy: Captain Hook

Time for another round of Why I Love That Bad Guy! I alluded a while back that this fellow was coming, and now, finally, I can pay tribute to the great…

Name: Captain James Hook

Origin: Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie, a 1904 play and 1911 book.

History: Captain Hook, head of the pirate ship Jolly Roger, was said to be “Blackbeard’s boatswain” and “the only man Long John Silver ever feared”. He is Peter Pan’s archenemy, tirelessly seeking vengeance since the boy cut off his right hand and fed it to a crocodile. The beast enjoyed the taste so greatly that it followed Hook endlessly, hoping for another. It eventually got its wish, when hero and villain engaged in a final duel that ended with Peter kicking Captain Hook from his own ship into the croc’s waiting jaws. Though he met his end, Hook died with the satisfaction that Peter had finally shown “bad form”.

Why I Love Him:

• He is, quite literally, a classic villain. If anyone were to tell me that they’d never heard of Captain Hook, I would call that person a liar. He’s been recreated in so many different ways — books, Disney films, comedies, dramas, modern reinterpretations and television shows — because he offers such a versatile personality.
• He has (when it suits him) a code of honour. He speaks often of “good form”, particularly in the book, where he is irritated by Peter’s apparent ease with showing such honour.
• Traditional views of Hook show him as having a certain elegance in his diction. Nothing nicer than a smooth-talker.
• He has a handlebar moustache. Perfect for twiddling maniacally while plotting Peter Pan’s death.
• He is confident. How can I tell? Just look at the flamboyancy of his costume…
• He has the ultimate villain handicap — a hook for a hand. Bad guys always seem a little bit badder when they have scars on display.
• Two words: Colin O’Donoghue. Have you seen Captain Hook in the TV series Once Upon A Time? Talk about your unexpected eye candy… (Ladies, I’ve provided a photo down below for your viewing pleasure…)

I Would Love Him More If…

• …he were less of a coward. I’m thinking particularly of the Disney film, where he frequently and awkwardly clambers over Smee to avoid the ticking horror of the crocodile. Comic relief, sure, but no one likes a cowardly bad guy.
• …he hadn’t been an afterthought. That’s right — in Barrie’s early drafts, Hook didn’t exist. Mischievous Peter himself was the closest the book had to a villain.
• …he were a ninja. Ninjas kick arse.

Favourite Quotes:

“He’ll crow. He’ll fight. He’ll fly. And then… he’ll die.”
– Hook

Hook: “Proud and insolent youth, prepare to meet thy doom.”
Peter: “Dark and sinister man, have at thee.”
– Peter Pan (book/play)

Interesting Fact About Captain Hook:

As one might assume, Captain James Hook was not born with the name “Hook” — hell of a coincidence that would have been, huh? However, in what is perhaps one of the greatest, most ambiguous quotes I’ve ever read, Barrie writes:

“Hook was not his true name. To reveal who he really was
would even at this date set the country in a blaze.”

Verdict: AWESOME.

- Love The Bad Guy

Why I Love That Bad Guy: The Grinch

Here we are readers, once again taking the disturbingly joyful (or joyfully disturbing…) stroll down the path of my Bad Guy Adoration.

Did you have a good Christmas? Is that holly, jolly spirit still flowing through you? I hope so, because at this time of year, I could think of no better bad guy to idolise than that mean, green Christmas-hating villain…

Name: The Grinch

Origin: Dr. Seuss’s 1957 children’s story, How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

History: The Grinch lives just north of the peaceful, Christmas-loving town of Who-ville, with his sole companion — his dog, Max. With a heart two sizes too small, the Grinch devises a cunning plan to steal every decoration, present and scrap of Christmas from the town, and thus end the Whos’ happiness.

However, the Grinch learns that all-important lesson — that Christmas is not about things, but about the love we share. Filled with the joy of Christmas, the Grinch’s heart grows three sizes that day; he returns to the Whos all of their possessions, and is warmly welcomed into the Who-ville community.

Why I Love Him:

• He often speaks in rhyme — he clearly has the soul of a poet.
• He’s as cuddly as a cactus and as charming as an eel.
• His two-sizes-too-small heart has room for a dog. A dog called “Max”. How small could that heart really be?
• He, unlike many villains, is able to enjoy a happy ending. There’s nothing like the endearment of redeement. (What’s that? The word is “redemption”? But… But… That doesn’t rhyme. You’re ruining my rhyme.)
• He was portrayed by Jim Carrey in the 2000 live-action film, one of my all-time favourite comedic actors. (And unlike Mike Meyer’s Cat in the Hat, I wasn’t completely creeped out.)

I Would Love Him More If…

• …he hadn’t tried to… you know… Steal Christmas. Yes, that’s the point of his tale; yes, it leads to his happy ending, but… C’mon. It’s Christmas. You can’t not like Christmas! (Or its festive counterparts, like Kwanzaa and Hanukkah, of course!)
• …he wasn’t a procrastinator. Okay, Mr Grinch, you don’t like Christmas, then fine — eliminate it. But why wait fifty-three years to do it? Pull your thumb out, son.

Favourite Quote:

“It came without ribbons! It came without tags! It came without packages, boxes or bags! … Maybe Christmas doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas… perhaps… means a little bit more!”

Interesting Facts about the Grinch:

Like Charles Dickens’s famous character, Ebenezer Scrooge, the very name “Grinch” is widely used to refer to someone who acts unfavourably in the holiday season. The 2000 live-action film made reference to this, with “The Book of Who” stating: “The term Grinchy shall apply when Christmas spirit is in short supply.”

And here’s a bonus fact about the Grinch’s creator: Did you know that the correct pronunciation of “Seuss” does not rhyme with “goose”, but with “voice”? Weird, huh?

Verdict: AWESOME.

- Love The Bad Guy

Be awesome! Be a Book Nut!

For a man who spoke in rhymes and published a series of twisted, fantastical children’s books, I’m sure we can all agree that Dr Seuss was a brilliantly insightful man.

Oh, The Places You’ll Go was read out at my high school graduation, and brought many of us to tears. It was perfect.

I absolutely loved reading through this list of wonderful quotes; I hope you will, too.

- Love The Bad Guy

DAY 21: Favourite Picture Book From Childhood

When you’re a child, nearly any picture book that is bright and colourful and keeps your attention will be regarded as “your favourite”. But now, looking back, I can pin-point a few of the greatest.

There was And Kookaburra Laughed, which was given to me by my Nanna and Pop and always shines with that lovely memory. There’s Old Man Emu, which also carries the brilliant memory of my cousin and I sitting at our grandparents’ house and reading the book with the accompanying sing-a-long CD. And there’s Wombat Stew, which is hopefully one that someone else will remember, because it would sadden me to think that it is a book that could be forgotten.

But when it comes right down to it, my favourite picture book is The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams.

Admittedly, I may be a little biased. You see, I was in the book when I first read it. It was a birthday present from my mother; she had the book remade with details about my life inserted into the story – my name, my sister’s name, my cousins’ names, and my address. For a little bookworm-ish girl, this was just all that and a bag of cookies. I mean, c’mon: I was in the story! It just doesn’t get much more awesome than that.

It was several years before I read the story as it is meant to be read, but the fact remains that the little Velveteen Rabbit and old Skin Horse get to me every single time.

- Love The Bad Guy

DAY 15: First “Chapter Book” You Can Remember Reading As A Child

I’ve mentioned previously that Snugglepot and Cuddlepie holds a special place in my heart, because it was one of the first books I read by myself.

However, I don’t wish to be redundant, so my answer for today is: Just Annoying, written by Andy Griffiths and illustrated by Terry Denton. The Just! Series is a collection of stories narrated by a young boy named Andy who winds up in hilarious and simple-minded situations. Not only did Griffiths write great stories for kids, but Denton also made the series memorable with his quirky doodles in the margins (as well as a flip-book picture-story in the corners of the pages).

Is this the right book for you?

Take the ANNOYING TEST and find out.

1. Do you ask ‘Are we there yet?’ over and over on long car trips?
2. Do you like to drive people mad by copying everything they say and do?
3. Do you hog the shower and use up all the hot water?
4. Do you enjoy asking silly questions that have no real answers?
5. Do you swing on the clothesline whenever you get the chance?

SCORE: One point for each ‘yes’ answer.

3-5 You are obviously a very annoying person. You will love this book.
1-2 You are a fairly annoying person. You will love this book.
0 You don’t realise how much fun being annoying can be. You will love this book.

- Love The Bad Guy

DAY 10: Book That Changed Your Life

Many books have inspired and enthralled me, and as a result, many books have changed my life, even in the smallest way.

But if I had to choose just one (…which I do, ’cause that’s the challenge) it would have to be Snugglepot and Cuddlepie by May Gibbs. The reason is quite simple: it was the first book that I can remember reading all by myself (a proud achievement in and of itself), but was also the first one that had me thinking, “Wow, this book is great… I wish I could write something that would entertain people like this!”

And thus the dream began…

…Plus, they are just freaking adorable.

(Not Banksia men, though. Banksia men are the reason why I refused to sit beneath our Banksia tree at home. Because I just knew that if I let my guard down, a tribe of Banksia men would fall upon me and drag me back to their lair…

…And I dunno about you, but that picture doesn’t appeal to me at all.

- Love The Bad Guy